Saturday, April 28

Yep, she's mine!

Yesterday Piko de Gallo and I were tooling around in the back yard, and suddenly she yells:

"There's a spider in my green bucket! DO NOT WANT!!!! DO NOT WANT!!!!!"

I about peed in my pants laughing. Then like a good mom I sprayed it out with my hose.

Thursday, April 26

Sweat it and forget it.

Gah! Spring break kicked my butt, and not in a good way.
Having Piko de Gallo home all day and planning entertainment for her was more exhausting than I remember. I'm going soft with this part day pre-school stuff. We went to gymnastics, swimming, grocery shopping(which is an event now that she does not fit in the cart), and ice skating. Finally on Saturday when the first words out of her mouth were "What are we doing today?!", I had to reply "Today is entertain yourself day!! WOOO!!!"

I'm out of shape. And this should not come as news to anyone who knows me. I have only recently jumped on the gym bandwagon. Heartily encouraged by the photographs of me at my brother's wedding last year. This month marks one full year of consistent exercise. The Librarian laughed when she first read my profile and the first thing listed under interests is "Exercise", har-har!

My motto has been, and will probably always be "No sports that involve running, or a ball." Working out at the gym is not a sport is it?

I was very bad during spring break, I did not get to the gym for the whole week. Once Sarge got out of bed I was too exhausted to go. This was the first week that I was able to get serious about going again, and Sarge has made me a new workout. It's insane! We've moved from a muscle building high weight workout to a cardio focused low weight high rep circuit schedule.

Here it is.

Day 1
Bench Crunch
Two Point Bridge
Back Extension
Chest\Quads\Triceps
Barbell Squat
Flat Barbell Bench Press
Overhead Dumbell Squat
Incline Alternating Dumbell Press
Leg Press
Fly Machine
Rope Tricep Press

Day 2
Swiss Ball Crunch
Hanging Leg Raise
Plank
Back\Hamstrings\Biceps
Stiff Leg Deadlift
Pullup
Leg Curl
Seated Row
Barbell Good Morning
Pulldown
Dumbell Curls

Day 3
Twisting Back Extension
Side Jackknife
Hanging Leg Raise
Shoulders\Calves
Calve raise on Leg Press
Alternating Dumbell Press
Overhead Dumbell Squat
Front Raise
Suitcase Deadlift
Side Raise

I begin each weight day with a 13 minute warm up run, at least 1 mile. Each day I try to do a circuit with low weights and at least 20 reps, and a second circuit with 15 reps. If I'm feeling frisky I might throw in a third circuit, but that is a very rare occasion. And on alternating days I do a 2 mile run (24 minutes, I'm slow), and hip abductors.

OW.

The scale has yet to budge below 154.06 lbs. It might have something to do with those chocolate bunny cookies I made the other day. What the hell else do you do with a 5lb solid milk chocolate easter bunny that some fool felt approriate to give to a 4 year old.

Wednesday, April 18

I need to score some grass.

Cat grass that is. This damn cat is trying to eat my plants. And Piko de Gallo is having just a little too much fun squirting her with the sprayer(thanks She Said! for reminding me what a good training tool that is).

Tuesday, April 17

Monday, is that you?!

The answer:

HELLS YES!!!

What happened today that made my head explode?

Well, it all started with a 12:25am power outage. Was I up? Yes I was. Did I then go to bed? Well, I tried. Damn smoke detector in my bedroom started beeping, and beeping. Dog de G, starts pacing, and whining, pacing, and whining. I get up, press the reset.........beep!............beep!........ No luck. Take out the battery..............it worked.......beep!........FRACK!!!
Fumble around for a replacement battery in the dark, I know we have some, Sarge bought 8 of them the other month! FINALLY find the battery, replace, golden silence. Yay, finally able to go to bed. I was so tired I wanted to throw up.

Wake up, cat's breakfast, pick up cat puke, dog out, breakfast for Piko, coffee, paper, computer, dog in, my breakfast, dog's breakfast.

Then downhill....
1. A suspicious TKO auction cancellation from an overseas bidder. What? If you wanted to know that your S&H was going to be $11.50 USD, you should have asked first!! Now I can't even do a second chance offer.

2. Trip to Target with Piko de Gallo starts off great! A few tears in the car because she "Really, really wanted to go to IKEA!!!!!". Whatever. Target, return crappy National Geographic RC snake. Find cool roaring mini T-rex flashlight/key chain for Piko. AND THEN!!!!! Piko, where's your hat? The hat that you begged me to make for you! The one you picked out the fabric for, the one you pestered me for all day yesterday, THE ONE I HAD TO MAKE OVER TWICE!!!! Mommy meltdown? Yeeeeah, that was me in the Forrestville Target freaking out over a lost hat. Ended on a good note though, someone turned it in to lost and found. (And that T-rex, yeah, she didn't get it because she showed me she is irresponsible with her belongings. That's right, right?)

3. We come home to, NO POWER. BAH! 45 minutes later, power back on.

4. 2:45. No internets. No tv. No phone!

5. Ironing Sarge's uniform, the iron decides that it's just going to barf all it's water out onto the clothes, instead of making steam. DAMN YOU!!! I JUST BOUGHT YOU 3 WEEKS AGO!!!

All I have to say is that the cable or power better not go out at 8:00 tonight! Mhz is teasing me again with promises of Footy!

It's all the little things that make me nutty.

Friday, April 13

For Dennis

Dear Dennis,
White hair can work. You just have to own it.

The obvious choice. Anderson Cooper, classic silver fox.


Ye ole stand by. George Clooney.


And Mrrrrarwww!! Nick Fury, agent of S.H.I.E.L.D. Grrrrrrr.


Granted this is coming from someone who just found her own first white hair. Not counting the mutant one that grows out of my elbow.

Wednesday, April 11

Kid magnets

So what's the deal?

Whenever we go out as a de Gallo family we seem to attract kids. I know we're not that fun, because we're always yelling and arguing with each other. Yet, they are drawn to us like...well, they're drawn to us.

I don't mind mystery kids coming and playing with Piko while we're out doing stuff. I think it's great to encounter a friendly child who is confident enough to play with new kids. UNDER THE WATCHFUL EYE OF THEIR PARENTAL UNIT.

What I don't like it the child that would much rather have MY attention. Or rather NEEDS my attention.

For example. We took Piko to a splash pool the other week, just for a change in the routine, and Sarge was off during the week. We figured it would not be too crowded, and we would have a good time. It was empty!! Maybe two other kids there when we got there. However once we all got into the pool and started hanging out, this girl who was probably about 8 or 9 came over. Now Piko is not much into getting splashed or actually swimming, so naturally we stick close to her and pay alot of attention to what she's doing. Well this mystery child comes over, and I'm thinking great, a kid for Piko to play with, more fun for everyone. Yesh, I wish. She wanted me to watch her swim backwards, dive under water, teach her how to do a handstand. Will I come with her while she goes down the slide? Can I watch her jump off the diving board? Watch me! WATCH ME!!

No, not so much.

Where was her parental unit? Sitting outside the swimming area watching her from behind the glass. Sarge says I should cut him some slack because at least he brought her to the pool in the first place. Sure, but I swear I saw one of the lifeguards napping. I'm not too sure I want to put too much faith in them.

Here is my theory on this, and it has been influenced by my sister-in-law who is an elementary school teacher. She says that you can really separate the kids that get alot of attention at home from the kids who don't. The kids who do get alot of attention are alot more confident and independent. Children who do not are usually begging for her constant attention, especially in the early days of school. Now, I know that I am very, very lucky to be able to stay at home with my kid and be with her so much. And I sure do understand dual working parents, and don't think that they're doing the wrong thing by working, quite possibly the family would suffer even more if they did not go to work. Heck if my career path was not "Retail" I'm sure I'd be at work right now too. But I do think that spending time with your kid does not have to mean being a stay at home parent. It means when you go to the pool or the park, or even just at home you actually take part in the activity, play, swim, have fun, INTERACT. Have fun WITH your child. Pay attention TO your child. Show them that you are interested in what they are saying, even if you don't understand what they are saying. Yes it's very annoying to watch your kid do the same trick over and over and over and over again. And listen to the same knock knock joke a million times. But you know what's even more annoying? Having to watch someone elses kid.

Honestly, I don't think that I have the all the answers, but I have noticed that giving Piko alot of attention, and doing things with her has lead to alot more independent playing. I know that does not make much sense, but when we're at home, she'll play by herself while I'm computer-ing, or sewing, for hours! But she knows that when she comes to me with a question or wants me to look at something I'll stop what I'm doing and pay attention to her.

Let's not even get into the whole: I'm a stranger, and you're not paying attention to what your kid is doing.

Tuesday, April 10

Booooo!!!!

Darn you Mhz!! What a tease. The AFL season was supposed to start tonight, but noooooooo. I'm sorry I'm just not that interested in Slovakian mysteries.
SHORTY SHORTS!! DARN IT!!! I WANT SHORTY SHORTS!!!



And on a side note, She Said, your comment section is disabled.

Sunday, April 8

Finally!!

Traveling to Maine last September I missed the AFL finals. It was an awesome match from what I have read. The final score was WCE 12.13.85 df. Syd 12.12.84. One point!!! Eagles won by one point!!!! And where was I? Eating fried dough and discussing the merits of autumn leaves.

Well, after much fretting and nail biting, it looks like MHz here in the Metro area is set to start airing games again. The season has already begun in OZ, but I think that we are only going to be one week behind. I'm praying for a Collingwood match on Monday's show.

What the hell am I on about?




Yes sure, I won't lie, at first I was attracted by the muscular men running around in shorty shorts. But then I really got into it. Scary.

I have even discovered that there is a local team in my area.
I'm trying to get Sarge to go out for Ausball with me.
So far, no such luck.

Thursday, April 5

100% Made of AWESOME!

Another reason to love Alanis Morissette.



I laughed so hard coffee came out of my nose.

Wednesday, April 4

The Funny, It Burns!

From the Mock The Stupid Live Journal.

Go to Google Maps, type in "Maryland to London" or variations as such. See step number 22.


My house to London.
Gotta love scarcastic bastards working on the internets.

Sunday, April 1

GAH! AAA!!! AWWW F@$%!!

This week I spilled my coffee twice. I'm not talking a small regular household mug. The de Gallo coffee cup is a whopping 24 oz.
It would be a tragedy of course if it was just the coffee spilled. However in the usual over dramatic fashion I had to spill the whole damn cup on my computer keyboard and computer chair. And then a day later all over the couch and the tv remote.
Luckily Piko de Gallo was at school the first time, and in bed the second.
Because I let it rip.
It was like the opening scene of Four Weddings and a Funeral, where Hugh is late for the wedding and he's running around the house yelling "Bugger!". Yep that was me.

A lovely side effect though is now my chair and couch smell like coffee. It's strangely calming.